What do you think of when you read the word “trust” in Proverbs 31:11? If you are like most women, you probably define it as a belief that someone or something is reliable, good, honest, effective, etc. And you wouldn’t be too far off with that definition. But in the Bible, trust means more than that. Trust means being confident, secure, and sure about someone or something.
Most men want a wife that they can trust – in all senses of the word. If we become reliable and effective in managing our homes and families, our husbands become confident in us, and more secure in the marital relationship that they have with us. Men generally have an outward attitude of strength and control, but inside, they can really be insecure in their relationships with their wives. Here is an example from my own life.
My wonderful husband texts me...a lot...every day. I get a text when he is leaving one job site and heading for another. I get a text letting me know he is on his way home. I get a text reminding me to transfer funds. I get a text asking me about dinner. And of course, I get a text telling me that he loves me and that the coffee pot is all set for me. But if I don’t respond back to any of these texts, even with a simple “ok”, he starts to worry. And sometimes he starts to feel a little bit insecure. If I text to him that all important “I love you”, then everything is right in his world. Honestly, ladies, it really can be just the simple things that make all the difference in the world to our men.
The second issue that we need to consider in addition to trust is the one pertaining to submission. Yes, I did just say submission. Really, ladies, it is not a bad word. When you think of submission in the context of the Biblical reason we were created – to be a helpmeet – it can make all the difference in your relationship with your husband.
Submission simply means the act of accepting or yielding to the will or authority of another person. We submit all the time without thinking about it; yet when it comes to submitting to our husbands, we object. In our day-to-day lives, we submit to our government by paying taxes on our purchases; we submit to law and order when we stop at stop signs; we submit to our physicians when we obey their instructions, we submit to our employers’ requests (if working outside of the home), and so on. Why should we view submission differently when relating to our husbands? They are the authority that God gave us to protect us. And don’t forget, our husbands have to submit too...to their head...Jesus.
Trust and submission go hand-in-hand when creating your Home Management Binder. Your days should be in alignment with your husband’s expectations. You can be the best housekeeper in the world, but if dinner is always late or poorly cooked, your husband may not be happy. The same is true with the reverse. You might always have wonderful, healthy gourmet meals prepared for your husband, but the house is dusty, dirty, and chaotic; and so he is not happy. It’s all about finding the balance between what needs to be done and the expectations of your husband.
The second part of Proverbs 31:11 states, “so that he shall have no need of spoil.” I admit that initially, this second part puzzled me. I mean, if we align our days with our husband’s desires for the home, are we not then “spoiling” him? However, if you research the original meaning of the word “spoil”, it actually refers to the rewards of battle. You might have even heard the cliché “to the victor go the spoils”. After a particular tribe or city was destroyed by the Israelites, God sometimes permitted the victors to keep things for themselves. Spoils could include anything from animals to metal utensils and pottery to even slaves.
This particular verse is telling us that his wife is keeping him so happy at home, and feeling as though he has everything he needs, that he is not interested – or has no need of – any of the spoils. Everything his heart desires is already within his home.
To put this into a modern perspective, the husband is so happy to come home and be with his wife and family that he doesn’t even notice the other women surrounding him. They have nothing with which to tempt him. As long as his physical, mental, emotional, and intimate needs are being met by his wife, what could any other woman possibly offer to him? Satan only has an opportunity when there is discord between the husband and wife and when the home is no longer his sanctuary. Completing a Home Management Binder will go a long way to creating that wonderful sanctuary for your family!
Your relationship with your husband should only be second to that of your relationship with our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ!
Blessings be upon you.
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